Woman tells 25-year-old boyfriend to distance himself from his twin sister who says she likes his pheromones: 'The insecurity will feed the girlfriend'

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Aug 24, 2025 10:00 PM EDT

Smell is a powerful thing. They say it's the sense that's most closely related to memory. It's easy to tell this just from personal experience. Sometimes a smell will take you all the way back, like if you smell that deodorant your crush used to wear or that type of eraser you would use in middle school. Without you even realizing it, you're back in your body at a different place at a different time. It's an amazing thing. 

Scent can also remind us of people. Growing up, everybody's house had a smell. You could tell whose house you were in just by the whiff you'd take after opening the door. Some of those scents made you feel good because you had positive associations with them. You made good memories there and felt safe, so the scent was comforting to you. But other smells don't make you feel so good. If I ever got a whiff of my childhood doctor's office, I'd be transported in a second and I would not like it one bit. This is all to say it's no wonder we have strong associations with them.

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  • A woman sniffs her own hoodie sleeve.
    via Toa Heftiba

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • The question of scent came up between a man, his sister, and his girlfriend. When his sister started talking about scents, it set off all kinds of red flags in his girlfriend. But was she right to react this way, or was it a major overreaction? Read on for the story and decide for yourself. 
     

  • My sister said she loves being around me because of my pheromones... is this as weird as my girlfriend says?

    So last weekend was my 25th birthday. My girlfriend, my sister, and I were all hanging out, drinking, laughing, and joking around. At one point, the conversation turned to how some people smell bad and some smell really good.
    via u/Striking_Currency360
  • That's when my sister said the reason she's around me so much is because of my pheromones. She said she hasn't smelled it on anyone else, but that she can even smell it on my sweat.
    via u/Striking_Currency360
  • I'd heard of pheromones before, but honestly I always thought it was like a fancy cologne smell or something. The next day, though, my girlfriend told me I need to put serious space between me and my sister, because what my sister said was "very, very weird."
    via u/Striking_Currency360
  • At first I didn't really get why. But then I googled what pheromones actually are, and yeah... I guess I can see why it might sound off. Still, part of me feels like it was just a random comment, and I don't know if it's worth creating distance with my sister over.
    via u/Striking_Currency360
  • Like, if I smelled a nice natural scent from someone, I'd probably want to be around them more too, it wouldn't mean anything inappropriate. Am I missing. something here, or is my girlfriend overreacting?
    via u/Striking_Currency360
  • A man and a woman hug on a beach.
    via Unsplash+ (A. C.)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • Commenters weighed in on this situation.

    • _ Amarok · 1d ago Tbh this sounds way more like "sister is talking about sh she doesn't actually understand" than "sister is trying to say she's attracted to me." It's pretty common recently. People vaguely understanding concepts - especially therapy/social science speak - and incorrectly applying it to their life.
    via u/_Amarok
  • ExtremeAd7729 22h ago . Or it's the girlfriend who doesn't. "Pheromones are chemical substances secreted by an organism that elicit a social response in other members of the same species" My parents and siblings smell like... family. There's something safe about it but definitely would be sexually repulsive. That's also the effect of pheromones.
    via u/ExtremeAd7729
  • F3Grunge 1d ago Any chance you and your sister are not biologically related?
    via u/F3Grunge
  • Striking_Currency360 OP She's my twin.
    via u/Striking_Currency360
  • Thefattestbeagle 1d ago · Edited 1d ago . This probably adds an even more complicated biological layer here than not everyone will understand. You two probably grew up very close as siblings, so it makes sense that your natural scent would be comforting to her.
    via u/Thefattestbeagle
  • Astazha 1d ago "Pheremones" where humans are concerned usually has a S ual connotation. It is possible that your sister didn't mean it like that. Yes it's weird but we can't read her mind.
    via u/Astazha
  • ARussianBus 23h ago • Pheromones means smell. There's weird comments in here trying to say it's a purely S ual connotation and isn't smell, but they're wrong. Yes, phenomenones often has as ual connotation, but it doesn't inherently. Your sis didn't imply it sexually (ideally lol) and your gf (and commenters here) are inferring it strictly sexually.
    via u/ARussianBus
  • People have smells and your twins smell is going to be familiar and comforting without having any sual connotation. I feel for sis bc there's no great way to say what she means here since "I like your smell" sounds creepy so she probably went for a scientific term not knowing it's also got a creepy connotation.
    via u/ARussianBus
  • Salim 22h ago • Unlike the kneejerk reactions of every other commenter here, who have no idea what they're talking about, I'll give you a scientific explanation for this. It's been shown through research that women prefer the scent of men that are genetically dissimilar when ovulating, and
    via u/Salim_
  • genetically similar at other times. Also preferring the smell of genetically similar men when on hormonal birth control. Which means a large portion of the time, it is perfectly normal for a woman to prefer the pheromones (oooooh coooooties) of their MALE FAMILY members. Let that sink in for all the idiots who think your sister is on some bender.
    via u/Salim_
  • To add onto this immensely, If you are monozygotic or dizygotic twins, you share up to 50% or 100% of your genes with your sister. That makes you the MOST similar, genetically, than to anyone else on the planet... Even compared to your biological parents. A non-twin sibling could clock out at ~23-33%
    via u/Salim_
  • genes, which means the pheromones coming off you are likely just very comforting for her. The relationship between twins goes far beyond all this psychologically, but I won't go into that. She doesn't know what she's talking about, but at the same
    via u/Salim_
  • time, the smell feels comfortable because you're family and the reality is, people's smells aren't just to elicit s hormone responses. So she actually does know what she's talking about, in a way. I'd encourage your girlfriend and 90% of the other commenters to grow up, and
    via u/Salim_
  • think about whether when they lean in and smell grandma's rose perfume and feel good, if that is a s ual reaction or not! It is NOT weird. For crying out loud, this is your sister and you're gonna let the entire internet and your girlfriend knock her down a peg for an honest biological reaction she commented on while dr_nk??
    via u/Salim_
  • brbleavemessage · 23h ago . It's a comforting familarity to her and she expressed it awkwardly. Don't over think it, the insecurity will feed the girlfriends.
    via u/brbleavemessage
  • Lette.... 1d ago · Edited 1d ago I think it's likely that she just meant that she likes your scent because it's familiar to her. People like the smell of new born babies too, but that doesn't mean they wanna... ok I'm not gonna finish that thought actually.
    via u/LetterNo7829
  • What I'm trying to say is there certainly doesn't have to be anything s ual in her intent - but it's possible she's not entirely familiar with the concept of pheromones and their connotations when used about humans.
    via u/LetterNo7829
  • Dizzy-Run-633 · 23h ago I don't think it's weird at all. Just watch a parent smell the top of their child's head and look like they're getting high off it. Much of pheromones. (or what your sister is calling pheromones) emanate from the top off the scalp.
    via u/Dizzy-Run-633
  • People you are immediately related to will have an intensely comforting smell, and it isn't unusually even now for my older sister to smell my head and claim she could distinguish it from any other smell - she calls it 'my little sister's little oil field'
    via u/Dizzy-Run-633
  • Your gf is overreacting imo. Your sister has basically said the equivalent of 'oh I love the smell of Old Spice, because it's what my dad would always wear' - it is comfort, familiarity and love.
    via u/Dizzy-Run-633
  • SoCalKim 22h ago Wow people can't fathom it's comforting to be around family you love.
    via u/SoCalKim

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